"Higher" by Heidi Montag

Unless you have been living in a remote mountain cave, chances are you have not only had the misfortune to hear "The Hills" reality "star" Heidi Montag's first "single," "Higher," but you have also seen the gratuitous boobfest she attempted to pass off as a music video.  It was so horrendous it was taken off YouTube and all other websites approximately 24 hours after debuting due to the video's poor fan feedback and its potential to lower the IQ of viewers by up to 18 points.  "I just started sobbing uncontrollably," Montag told Us magazine, "I cried myself to sleep that first night after my video came out."

Yeah, that was our reaction too.

I can think of only one thing I've encountered recently that is more completely terrible than the music video for "Higher," which is, of course, the song itself.

The song's one redeeming quality is its profound lyrical message:

I’m only going higher, higher, I’m gonna take it higher, higher
No time for looking back, I dream and that’s a fact, I’m only going higher, higher, higher.

Higher, higher, higher, higher, higher, higher, higher, higher

I’m only going higher, higher, I’m gonna take it higher, higher
No time for looking back, I dream and that’s a fact, I’m only going higher, higher, higher.

I’m only going higher, higher, I’m gonna take it higher, higher
No time for looking back, I dream and that’s a fact, I’m only going higher, higher, higher.

Feel the wind on your face, we frolic or race, we can go at your pace, pace, the power lifted me so I set me free.

Am I dreaming?

So, you know, at least there's some meaning to the song.